Just The Two of Us! Or Maybe 3 of Us…

Man oh man, this is the big fish in the sea. Nearly everyone has tried this and nearly everyone wants this. A mutually exclusive monogamous relationship with their partner and love of their life. The combination of preferences that align with values both religious or otherwise. A study by Gitnux found that only 17% of monogamous relationships last more than two years. Yet people crave them and there's nothing wrong with that.

I myself used to crave monogamous relationships but now they are something I think I've outgrown. Now I just want to be loved and cared for in general by significant others because that's more enjoyable for me. I've often found with monogamy I want something more as if I'm not 100% satisfied with the person I'm with. Usually that's through no fault of their own and more so because they have qualities that I don't like which I've found to be complemented by someone else.

In a personal relationship like this it's important to be open and honest about how you feel and what you want. It's not worth the headache to try and balance or juggle multiple relationships in secret simply because your partner isn't comfortable with you sharing your heart. So if your mutually exclusive and monogamous you've got to respect those boundaries. Or just quit the relationship and find people who are open to what you desire.

I've found that that are several dating apps out there for people seeking polyamorous relationships. Granted not all these apps are as effective as tinder but they are a step in the right direction. I've also found a lot of times through hookup culture most of the people participating in it aren't satisfied with monogamy anyway. Sometimes people want to be open but feel like they can't find anyone who fits that standard.

Love is unnecessarily complex and filled with emotions that sometimes get the best of us. But it's not until you've dated multiple people at once that you really start to see that you have the capacity to love more than one person at a time. Being monogamous is for some people though and there's nothing wrong with that and we've all tried it so there's no sense in knocking it. I'd say the lesson here is to be honest and be yourself so you can find the combination that makes you feel most complete.